someone just confided in me. I feel so glad that she is willing to tell me this. even though we are not close. Almost cried when i read what she said. I guess I understand because I am in a sports team too hur?

whatever happens. whatever we go through. I guess it's part and parcel of life. There's always up and down. everyone has their own problem to overcome.

I guess for now mine is to study damn hard since my results are like shit. I know I have so much to catch up.. =/

one more week and then there will be a victory dinner for swim team on wednesday. really looking forward it. can't bellieve swimming and water polo is going to end soon.
perhaps I would still go for training once a week/two weeks once? Don't want to lose my stamina and turn flabbly........haha.


Today my parents are weird, in a good way.
I wish I could be normal to them again. there's always this lock in me. I can't seem to open myself up to them, knowing that they are the most important people in my life, second comes friends. but it's so hard.

I am no longer blaming anyone. It's how life it is now. I want them to be happy. really. I think I have completely let the truth sink in. I am not complaining anymore. i know they love me so so so much..

it's just sometimes, part of myself still long for something sweeet like that..snuggling in between an insaparable couple, knowing that there is not enough space for 3 persons to sleep on that bed. trying to stop them from sleeping and talking nonsense. crying myself out in her hug when I feel down...

how childish is that. i know that i need none of these nonsense but everytime these memories re-surface, it hurts.

Time doesn't reverse. move on.