Good news:

---my mum just bought a thumbdrive for me! 1GB!!!!!!!! i am so happy! cuz i was actually saving money to buy one as last time i have already lost one!

---tomorrow morning i am going to play badminton with my old friends! CANT WAIT TO SEE THEIR STUPID FACES AGAIN!!!!! juz kidding, l0lz. they are very clever, seriously. Even smarter than me. I really "love" them very much. This group has variety of people... one is chio and qian bian. one smart and understanding. one tomboy and cheerful (pervertic), completely like a boy! except for the chest part, l0lz. one is thin but cute! one is short but is excellently good at sports! OMG! i love them soooooooooooooooooo much!! yay! cant wait to play..........

---today i just designed a new hairstyle for myself, which i think is quite suitable for me. haha

---xumin and i chatted for quite long. we talked bout he jun xiang! OMG! *blushing* l0lz she finally agreed that he is cute! what a good taste i have, eh?
-then we talked about working part-time. yea! i am so excited! I just cant described how hyper i am now! since both of us are getting our own ICs, we can work! part-time though. we planned to work during the june or final year holidays. To think that i can actually earn MY OWN MONEY BY MYSELF!! we can work in the library or as shop assistant. WAD A GOOD IDEA? as a librarian, there is air-cond some more! can slack a little bit. ha' her mum and my mum seem to agree us working part-time during the long holidays. but my dad objects a little...hmm...HOW?? i wanna try working!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1 hour about $5. work 5 hours per day will be $25! work for 5 days will be $125!! WOW.


---today went out with my mum to the library and parkway shopping for a while. she was surprised that i actually asked her out. l0lz. and we had fun and nice chAT then. i love my mummy! and daddy! i feel so loved and happy!!!!!! (omg wad happened to me?????????)



Bad news:

---today played alot, used the computer for too long. and spent alot of time with my parents therefore no time for other stuff like HOMEWORK, READING NEWSPAPER AND THE STORY BOOKS I JUST BORROWED TODAY. hais. I always procrastinate, that's the problem! what to do? will i be able to finish all these tasks by tomorrow? but i am going to spend alot of time with my old frens!!!!!

---today played computer games too much. kept on asking my frens to play games with me. i just couldnt resist the temptations of playing! All bcuz of Teonghang's fault!! wanted me to play with him for so many times then in the end i got addicted!!!!!







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I know i have been hurting you, deeply. right? You're so close to me yet I feel like i don't even know you, just like a complete stranger to me. Have i lost my consciousness? I totally have no idea what you re thinking and feeling. Even though you told me, but somehow i felt it wasnt true. was i too sensitive? or were u trying to hide sth from me? or was it a matter of trust?


No. This strong feeling in me told me that you were lying. Why? It can't be mistaken...

YOU'RE LYING!

how am i going to trust you? i tried but failed. how?
was i the culprit who caused you to lie? somtimes, i think i ignored you, admitting that i am a SELFISH girl, i will do anything to get my way to my destination. I knew what i was doing. but somehow, i think concentrating on those things are more important than you. I wish i could somehow make u happy and at the same time reach my destination.

I have been wondering, thinking hard.

was i the one who caused you not to trust me fully?

because you don't wish to tell me everything. and i wish you could.

I wish i could enter the blog of yours, or even your mind, i want to know what u re thinking. Although i am 90% sure that i was the one who upset you, but you're just so hard to undertsand. I want to know the truth...

feeling really sorry... sometimes, i really want to give you up. You re just like an angel to me. so beautiful and pure. Being with you, i feel like i will only give you more harm than good. what more? I wish i hadnt met you...


A change in me, not you.
Revenge on me, but i know you'll never want to.
become sadistic?
no. i havent reached that point.
I tried so to overcome the sorry thhat i feel towards you, but failed...








Something needs to be chnaged.









The color of my heart





















*this entry is long, but i wish u could read this part*