A week has passed. Campcraft competition is coming on this Saturday.. Finally! I really pray for good weather.. I don't want to let it delay any longer. It has been too long for us. Now, I just wish everything would be fine on that very day. We can do it!








Yesterday, after training, I went to have dinner with my ...... well, biological father at Plaza Singapura. I was surprised to see that not only his two Japanese friends were there, even my "Gu Gu/Aunt" , her husband and my "ShuShu / Uncle" were there. I had never seen them before and it was my first time knowing them. Well, the feelings were just weird and complex. It was even weirder for me to call them. My throat somehow went dry all of a sudden.. I can't even address him. Till now, I am surprised that I haven't called him once at all, after these 9 years... i can't really remember.. Sometimes I wish I could call him, like how I call my dad.. there were times when I had this strong urge to call but something seemed to stop me. I don't know what it is. Maybe hatred? Not so. Maybe we aren't close enough? Maybe for revenge? hmm.. I am not this bad. I think it's simply because we have lost that strong connection between a child and a father. Its like.. you can feel him but sometimes you lost feel for him. He is like an unknown person from another planet. Its so strange. Just by feeling scared to be around him and lose trust in him, is wrong. He is not supposed to give me this kinda feeling. Fortunately, these feelings faded away very soon as i got accustomed to the surrounding and people.





They seem really nice and friendly, even provide any help if I ever need any. For a moment, the idea of family wasn't so bad after all. It was rather sweet and heart warming. On the other side of this warmth comes the cold side. Do they really welcome me as what I really am? Or were these just acts of pretence? Or maybe some kind of courtesy? i know its stupid to think of such things. I shouldn't even think about it. Why care?

NICE BOOK AND MOVIE!





‘Scars (Stronger for Life)’ by Corrinne May

I just want to run
Just want to hide away
Close my eyes to your gaze
Just want to leave
Don’t want to hear them say
“You’re no good at this”

When the world swirls with naysayers
Broken wings and torn pages
The road ahead
Drowning in my tears

Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger for life

Losing myself
Gaining it back again
Forging strength from weakness
All that I am
All that I’m meant to be
Melting in your hand

Let the world swirl with naysayers
Pickled hearts and sour faces
What is real is what I cannot see

Cut away
All within me
That won’t bear fruit
Cut away
All within me

Scars make us stronger for life

I love this song. I think its in the Movie- The Leap Years. The movie comes from the book by CAtherine Lim called The Leaps of Love.

It's about a promise between a man and a woman, of meeting each other on every 29th February, at the same time and same place. Their strong will and faith to be together, after 12 years of great suffering and anguished separation, they got together after all.

I haven't watched the movie, but heard that its quite different from the book. But the book was nice. Just that it kinda ended too abruptly, in a way which i didn't quite like. The author should add more details. I dislike reading books that end up makes you feel "incomplete".

I like this phrase.

Scars make us stronger for life.

Indeed. If we never encounter any problems or obstacles in life, or get hurt, we can never realise how weak we are and the strength we need to survive. Maybe feeling pain isn't bad after all, it's just a process of becoming stronger. Endure is what we need. Scars may remain and engrave forever in our mind, but it can be a force which brings about more courage and determination to complete that finishing line of our life. So accept it. Take it. Use it.

I love Mother Tongue periods for this week!! We were watching this movie called The Brotherhood of war I think. Its a korean movie. I shall elaborate more on this after I finished it. we are gonna watch finish next Tuesday! nice nice nice! and sad sad sad.......... zzz

Gotto go. Bye! Tomorrow is Cat's birthday. seeing old gangs yay!