I feel so numb.

I feel so numb.

Today, I can't believe what I have done. Finally, I confessed in something which I have been hiding in the past. Standing in front of them, facing them, uttering every word of how I truly feel.. I could feel myself shivering.. Those words that have been kept for so long and it finally exploded on this very day.

It's truly a heart-breaking day. But well, who cares?

We have been together for four years.. We have been squadmates for four years.. We had so much fun. We played together. We became friends. We went out so often. We spent time together.. We were so close..

We are friends.
But postings break us apart, literally.

We are friends.
We fought. We betrayed. We talked bad behind the others. We hurt each other's feelings.

We are friends.
We smiled. We played. We laughed. But when it's np stuff.
You turned and walked away, leaving us behind without sparing a thought for us.
But we are still friends.

Its a repeated cycle. You never try to understand how we feel. Not even an apology given from you. Not even showing any hint of slight guilt. You have thousand of reasons to excuse yourself for all the involvements and commitments. So what if you come but your heart is not here? You came, but you wanted to leave as soon as possible without anything done yet. You came, but you complained. You came, but you didn't want to cooperate. You made a promise, but you didn't want to fulfil.

Why do we have to beg you, to please you all the time? What are WE TO YOU? Treating us as friends but turning away from us, leaving us in a lurch when we needed you.. And we are friends..

I have had enough. It's tiring to argue. Seriously, you are always right. Since when are we at the right side? No, we don't. We are always wrong no matter what we do. And YOU, are always so high up.. so pristine..

And, in such a serious occasion, you smiled. I am utterly speechless. You smiled. From there, I have given up my last hope and decided to walk away..

Go on with all your reasonings. I have no rights to fight for my stand, do I?










These are simply pictures from the memories. To you, I bet they are nothing to you. But it will be something for those who truly care.




We stepped in together as a squad, and here , we are going to leave individually as the first to break a record. If thats your wish, I will gladly grant you for what you want.

For those who read this and who truly care and teared, please don't waste your tears anymore. It's seriously not worth it to shed tears for those who have no feelings for us. But it will be worth shedding tears for those in the pictures.


Honestly, no point feeling angry. It's over. There 's no use yearning for a change because you won't. We will have to look forward to what is in the future. Those smiles are simply memories to be engraved forever.

They are my friends all the time. Always. But not in npcc.

They are gone, are they?